When Someone You Love is Abused at Work

As someone who typically tries to find the bright side of life, this post is going to be extremely off-topic for me -- so I apologize to my regular readers who look to me for a dose of inspiration or a good recipe.  Unfortunately, this topic is one that I feel I've been hearing about more and more lately -- and as a do-gooder in this crazy world, I'm trying to find answers.  I'm searching desperately for a way that I can help -- and I keep coming up empty.  I'm hoping someone out there can help me find a way to make a difference.

We're all keenly aware of horrific issues like domestic violence and child abuse.  And I'm sure many of us have been exposed to sexual harassment and diversity training in our workplace. As unpleasant as they may be, we've found a way to talk about and hopefully start resolving these kinds of abuse.  But lately I've heard several people, who are being abused in their workplace because of excrutiatingly poor management and leadership indifference. 

These are regular people who walk on eggshells at their jobs -- wondering if anything will happen that day to upset the angry monster that lives within their boss.  I can think of at least a half dozen people who have confided in me in the six months, sharing stories of bosses who fly off the handle, scream and yell,  threaten to fire them, put them on probation but give them no idea of what they've done wrong or how to improve. I even know of some who have in fact, been abruptly fired or forced to resign -- with no clear reason given as to why.

I know people who have gone on anti-anxiety medication after decades of perfect health, and others seeking professional counseling to deal with workplace anxiety.  And despite known complaints to human resources, and exit interviews where employees held nothing back about the magnitude of the problem, the managers who are at the root of the problem are never confronted, or held accountable for the environment that they've created.  In these difficult times, when jobs are so hard to find - the victims of the abuse feel helpless.  They take whatever is put upon them, and live in fear because they see no way out.

What has happened in this world that the executives of industries can look the other way, even though they know that this kind of workplace abuse is happening?  How does anyone sleep at night?   I've only heard stories -- and several within the past couple weeks that have truly turned my stomach -- and I know that I can't sleep at night.  And I'm not the one living it. 

So my question to anyone who cares to respond -- what advice do you give to a friend or family member who you believe is a victim of this kind of workplace abuse?   Do employees have a legal right to be managed with dignity and respect?   What is missing from our corporate worlds, that there could be so many people who rise to the level of authority, without learning how to lead and manage with decency and compassion? 

Something has got to change -- but what can I do to make a difference?

No More Hooey!

Have you ever had a job where you love the actual work you do -- but for some reason, you come home at night at just bitch bitch bitch about all the things that are wrong at work?   I feel like that has been the story of my life.  I am a pretty upbeat and positive person, and I try to stay focused on the great things we're accomplishing at work, but inevitably, when dinner time rolls around and the family starts talking about the highs and lows of our day, we linger a bit too long on Mommy's lows -- which really stinks, because I LOVE MY JOB. 


Well, after all these years, I think I may have figured out why this keeps happening to me.  I'm a result-oriented person living in a clock-watching world.  And here's the kicker -- I don't even own a watch.

I've always known I was result-oriented -- I mean, afterall, it's one of the bullet points under the "Professional Profile" of my resume :-) ... I just didn't know how it sucked the life out of me to work with clock watchers.  But as I'm reading this book, Why Work Sucks, it's all starting to make sense to me.

All I can say is God bless Andy Levine from Sixth Man for mentioning this book at a recent conference he spoke at.  I'm pretty sure I would have taken one look at the cover (and title) of this book and written it off as a bunch of hooey.  But even though I'm only on chapter 3, I really believe it's going to change my life.  In fact, I think it already has. 

Just for the record, the full title of the book is Why Work Sucks and How to Fix It: No Schedules, No Meetings, No Joke--the Simple Change That Can Make Your Job Terrific.  If you have ever felt like you needed some help dealing with the people you work with who measure your worth by the number of hours you're at your desk every day, or the number of meetings you attend -- instead of the value you bring to the organization -- you really really have to read it.

I know it might not be fully implementable if you're not the "big boss" of an organization -- but I think there are elements we can all apply to our lives.  And there is no doubt there is a truth to this book that should make everyone stop and think about how to work smarter in every aspect of their life.

OK...I'm rambling...and there is no point to that.  Get the book.  Read it.  Live it.

I'm off to make things happen!